Friday, 6 April 2012
*Boyfriend/Daddy Footnote*
We are little over 1 week old parents. As Hunter’s parents we’ve desperately tried to remain light hearted and jovial despite having very little sleep and spending hours trying to establish what the hell he wants when he cries – it’s like the most confusing game of charades ever.
Hunter sleeps in 2 to 3 hour patches, being awake for about an hour between, however when we most want to put him to bed (11pm) he decides to throw this schedule out of the window. He likes to keep his dad up until about 2.30am. I find myself wandering around our flat showing him the sights until I nearly nod off so have to sit down – this upsets him so I’m up again, rocking, soothing, rocking and soothing. I can’t believe he’s read up on military torture tactics.
One fear I had was when it came to soothing my child was me not coming up to scratch in the art of song. I’m no Celine Dion or Barry Manilow (That’s what the kids listen too right?) so thought I’d never calm Hunter by singing a lullaby. I have however found an alternative. I repeat noises or phrases over and over. i.e. shhh shhh sh sh shhh shhh sh shhh or sleep bom bom sleep bom bom. You get the point. I’m no Gary Barlow or Lennon and McCartney! This has had some success at 5am! Hunter basically looks at me for 20 minutes like I’m a mentalist but hey at least he’s judgmental eyes aren’t crying. I am also very happy in the knowledge that I could be embarrassing my son well before he’s in his teens! That’s the measure of success when it comes to parenting right?
Apart from a bit of sleep deprivation and the odd tantrum, Hunter John Merry has been a joy. He’s not too ugly too which I think is a miracle bearing in mind babies generally look like old men. My mum put it the best when she was on the phone to her friend ‘He’s got Sarah’s nose and mouth… apart from that he’s so beautiful.’ She of course meant ‘All the rest of him is beautiful too’ but she didn’t – This made me smile.
We took him to the town hall to register him as a real human and get his birth certificate. This was very exciting for me. We have a new member of the Merry Clan! It was also nice to get him out of the house, get some fresh air and pretend we know what we’re doing in public places – All very grown up.
Apart from that I have one phenomenon to tell you about. Nappies aren’t that bad. He’s had some black, tar like ones, weird yellowy little ones and the odd giant oozing brown one but despite my fears we’re doing ok. I did have one gag at 2am once but apart from that I guess they’re fine as long as they are products of your offspring. I expect many a space in this blog to be filled with toilet stories so I won’t continue too much more here…
But I will just say that you guys are now reading the words of a real life altruistic action hero. 2 days ago, Sarah and I were changing a nappy (Team changing makes it like a family event – like camping but less damp, mucky and expensive) and Hunter decided to pee… like a slow motion action dive, to the sound of heart beats and deep prolonged groans I lifted my hand blocking the projectile from hitting Sarah on the stomach. I then stood and waited for His Majesty to finish what felt like the longest and warmest wee in history. I thank you! This was a lot more successful than when he hit his new, clean outfit that I placed right next to him. Lesson learned!
Off to wash my hands,
Andy x
PS. We have been so touched by peoples messages, cards, presents, love and congratulations – It’s been really overwhelming and makes me realise how lucky we are and how lovely people can be. Thank you x
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Glad to hear you guys are enjoying being parents, I know you'll both do awesome.
ReplyDeleteSo happy you're settling in as new parents. Soon you'll have forgotten what life was like before he joined you. Good work on the wee blocking and nappy changing team!
ReplyDeleteI remember one night waking to an almighty eye watering stench when our son was just over a year old. We both crept in and changed the incredibly stinky, leaking nappy at 3am in limited light without waking the baby up! We hi-fived and everything!
Stealth nappy changing at its' best!!!